I’ve always thought people would find a lot more pleasure in their routines if they burst into song at significant moments. – John…
America is a country where half the money is spent buying food, and the other half is spent trying to lose weight. –…
The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept. – George Carlin
The one thing women don’t want to find in their stockings on Christmas morning is their husband. – Joan Rivers