Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that. – George Carlin
Well ya see, Norm, it’s like this… A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is…
Honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance, or a stranger. – Franklin P. Jones
We must believe in luck. For how else can we explain the success of those we don’t like? – Jean Cocteau
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. – Henny Youngman
Old people shouldn’t eat health food. They need all the preservatives they can get. – Robert Orben
Men, I want you just thinking of one word all season. One word and one word only: Super Bowl. – Bill Peterson, football coach