I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back. – Fred Allen
You know why the French don’t want to bomb Saddam Hussein? Because he hates America, he loves mistresses, and he wears a beret. He is…
The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us. – Bill Watterson, Calvin and…
You’re so jumbo, Sarah Palin can see you from Alaska! – Woot.com, gadget website, description of a very large universal remote control.
The thing that’s depressing about tennis is, no matter how good I get, I’ll never be as good as a wall. – Mitch Hedberg